Rocker's Journal

Long time....

2009-04-24T11:41:23Z

Wow yea... I'm so horrible maintaining this thing.. Even when things go crappy, I'm bad keeping it up!

So as general update, I'm unemployeed. The factory fired me the Monday or Tues before Thanksgiving, and been hunting since. And due to Michigan falling further and further down the hole, come Junish, I'll be staying with a friend in Vermont who is finding a 2 bedroom place, and feels sure about the job prospects around his area.

Aside from that, not much is up... ^_^;; I'm actually mainly posting to do a catch up, and venting about an odd position I've gotten myself into AGAIN...

So yea, luckily none of the friends I know through wow, know about this journal. But I started developing a crush on one I've been getting to know the last month or so. A short time I admit, so I was only a little surprised to realize I was crushing some. OF course, I come to find out she's been semi-talking with another wow friend she's know a year, who's like a state north of her, about becoming an item.

So yea, I'm a little anxious, because I DO wanna go ahead with my plan to visit still, because despite the crush and blahness, she is a wonderful friend who I greatly enjoy spending time with, and would love to hand out with. And will be working on trying to check cash, and train tickets, to see about going there for a couple weeks. But then, the other wow friend is going down this weekend, and is kind of seeing what they think about making it a more sure thing or not.... >.> So, I'm a little more then anxious and all blah about it, despite that even 'I' can see the logical sillyness to how I feel! unfortunetly, as I tell others often enough, Logic often has little to do with emotions and their ties...

But, so yea! Of course, I'm feeling completely stupid about feeling like I do, and doing my whole sounding blah and saying nothing thing, but she seems to be reading me pretty well to know when somethings up. ^_^;; Bt then, I don't think I'm as good about not opening up about it, since I've just been telling her about my thoughts. so it's not like she doesn't know my side and feelings for the most part. Eh... I just need to keep myself working and busy, probably packing and such for the VT trip after the two week trip... Way too much to think about, when also added with the Car once again not running, just when I thoght it was gonna be up and able, to get plates/tags and everything again!

So yea... you are are pretty much caught up now. ^_^;; We'll see what happens, that finally inspires me to vent a bit on here to let you all now whats up, and see if it'll at least be happier, even if not sooner!!

OT For the.... win?

2008-10-09T07:50:51Z

Hehe So the factory job is going well. Picked up some massive OT for this week though, thus not many people seeing me much. 4 hours + after our normal finish time,getting home at 3:30AM. Tons of fun! XD

the cash will be good, almost an entire check extra overall, will help me pay cable starting, try and set the cash aside for Wrath of the Lich King *hoping to find a CE version!* and have 100ish still, to have for gas and food all week. Finally starting to feel a little out of the hole, by not thinking about the various old medical bills and creditors trying to hunt me down. ^_^;;

Anyway, overall things have been good. Not much going on, beyond visiting friends over the last few weeks and such. Been getting the writing ideas going again, as been re-aquiring music from my last MP3 player purge, finding some older ones I had forgotten about, like Kamelot music and such things. ^_^;; So sad, when you can't remember something so nice until you happen to hear it again.

Anyway, gonna futz around the net for a bit until I crash, with two more days of OT to go! Talk to you all soon!

Final Fantasy music FTW!

2008-09-16T08:07:20Z

Followed by very successful performances in Stockholm and Chicago, I am excited to tell you that I will conduct the Distant Worlds: music from FINAL FANTASY concert on OCT 8, 2008, in Denver's magnificent Boettcher Concert Hall, with one of the world's greatest orchestras, the Colorado Symphony, and the Colorado Symphony Chorus. This marks the very first time an official Square Enix Final Fantasy concert devoted to the music of Final Fantasy will play in Colorado! The date is coming up very quickly, and I am looking forward to seeing you there for this fantastic night!

Tickets are also on sale now for another newly scheduled performance – Distant Worlds: music from FINAL FANTASY will make its Michigan premiere in Grand Rapids on April 14, 2009 at the DeVos Performance Hall, performed by the Grand Rapids Symphony and Chorus. And Uematsu-san himself will be joining us live in Grand Rapids for the performance and participating in a special VIP reception for a limited number of our audience after the concert.

There are many more performances of Distant Worlds being scheduled as I write this, and we will always make sure that you hear about it here as soon as we have each confirmed date.

OMG!!! I must find a way to get the cash together and go to this... Anyone ever been to the DeVos Performance Hall, to know what seats are good, for the very few Michiganders on my list? Also, anyone wanna try and go with, so we can try and get tickets in the same areas? XD

OMG Work!!

2008-09-16T07:50:45Z

So yes, for those of you who do not know, I'm fully employeed again. Probation period, doing Janitorial work in a GM factory ^_^ I'm always mading bank compared to my Wendy's Manager days, sad ne?

But yea, getting more and more stir crazy not having friends around. Ohioians are hard to get ahold of period, and Flintians I just haven't had the time/cash for gas to make the run up recently! So yea, all working and no fun makes Eric a little nutsy XD So if you all, who I can contact offline, find me pestering more then average, now you know why!

Anyway, wish me luck! Invited a friend to spend Christmas around here, but plans are all pending. Otherwise, if anyone wants to try and do something around Christmas time, not literally in the way of family things, let me know!

Not much else to say right now. hopefully before DEc, I'll be able to manage actual spending cash again! XD so many bills to catch up, between mums and my own.... So yes, pester me! Attentionwhore syndrome is kicking me around!! ^_^V

...But you soon will be.

2008-07-25T04:45:40Z

Might be loosing the car this month. Unless my mum really pushes herself to stretch her cash, I don't see a way to manage the $300 for this month. And with their determination that if I don't have it before the 30th, they will be coming out to pick it up, I'm dealing with a little feeling of defeat. I mean, I know I should accept I paid and used the car all this time as I needed, but this close to my finishing point and having to taken back, it just feels like all the cash I put into buying it was a waste, overall. Oh well, I'll work around trying to fix that feeling, and if they take it, finding a better deal around town, once I figure out how I'm going to get from one job to the other. ^_^;;

Side note, Porn store called back about my app and did a small interview today. Nothing definete, but feel confident they might pick me up, so hoping. Still, something about getting a job with them feels odd to me, and that in itself is surprising considering my rather casual stance on things sexual, even things most other people think is best left undiscussed.

But I digress. I am thinking about trying to put some time into writing sometime soon, if only for all the time I'm spending fighting my wifi-net now, and plus because I DO still want to work on my stories, ones in progress or unstarted, and hopefully I'll manage to figure out what I need to get myself started with it all. *is sure everyone has heard me say this more times then I can count*

thought I would update everyone. Wish me luck finding a second (Or third, if the porn place snags me) job, so I can start making ends meet.

P.S. side note, watched the Movie Sicko and the first of that guy's movies, and I'm honestly appauled at the fact that not only are war prisoners being given so much better care and health then our own citizens, but that everyone else and their mother has better health and state of living, then our country.... We still live here, why?

^_^;; I'm not dead yet

2008-07-21T16:52:29Z

Just something to let you all know I'm still around and such. My net is a little more limited, thanks to using whatever wireless in the area tends to be nice to me any given day, until I can find myself work. I have managed to find work at Ford Field, the Lion's stadium *Football for those non-sports types like me, who don't know either name* Doing cashier and food work. Unfortunetly, they also aren't stable on how many hours they might be giving me, since getting onto the non-uber events, means having senority, which means whoever has the most hours put in, with this place. Thus, the search for work continues, to try and find a second part time job to help fill the rest of the week. Hopefully soon, I'll manage to get my debt payments back in order so I can get myself out of it and such, as well as getting stable internet to be available for chatting and such fun things.

And while my Writer's block has not abated, I am still a WoW addict, and feeling a bit of my Roleplaying wants coming back some, even with lacking people to actually be able to play with, beyond normal internet pose-RP. ^_^;; I dun know, much as I do enjoy WoW alot, I wouldn't mind getting into other things to eat up some of my spare time. I've been learning lately, I tend to multi-task, when I get into things. Not bad overall, just seems to explain why I tend to seem a little spacy in conversations on occasions.

Anyway, gonna run for now, gonna put in an app with a hotel for becoming a Night Auditor. Later all!

PS ~ When you car can't seem to carry a charge, and the guys you have a warrenty with suddenly decide what might be wrong with it, might be something they won't cover... Blah on them.

wireless hotels... ha!!

2008-03-12T06:48:09Z

12:45AM, mountain time, and I can't find one resonable hotel with wireless... saw one, but an empty car was sitting in the drive up lobby window... convienent for the lazy guy I saw sitting inside watching something...

Anyway, gonna keep moving and try and find a place a little further down 80. Right now, bumming off a KFC's net connection, somehow...

Later!!

Home again, home again.

2008-03-04T21:12:18Z

Ok, so things should be a bit updated, for you all, since I KNOW I haven't let everyone know about this. Thanks to issues with the apartment complex Brent, Meg, and I live in, we are not being allowed to renew our lease. With the proper ahead of time they gave us, thus puts us having to be out by the end of March. After the plotting, and planning, and everything that has been worked out, plans finally got settled onto. So to speak. ^_^;;

March 9th is the end of my two week notice with Wendy's, allowing me leaving on good standing, in case I need to return to them back in Mich/Ohio, as a last resort. Have a couple other job options, but need to check into them, and see how they will pan out, first. HEard rumors a new Commune 3/4 or something might be getting together in Juneish, a good possibility for a place to live eventually. When I first get back, my mum has offered her couch for the first small bit, until I can find a place of my own again.

Should be back in that area around... Lets see, leaving on the eleventh, preferably early in the morning...if I figure by the same rate I went on my last trip through, I should be there by the 14thish, give or take a day. Just in time for Ami's B-day party it seems. ^_^ Not that much will be going on for my own, later in the month, with the sudden change in locals.

So that's pretty much the jist of it. Gonna check into BG, see if I can get those same details for enrollment again, since WOULD like to go to school and all, and see what I can see! Too bad the Ohio friends said Goth night stopped running, it was always good for a night out.

So anyway, Let me know when people are free, after the pointed out dates, so I can try and visit people when I have the ability!!

*ponders giving an Illinous friend a visit once more*

Home again, home again

2007-10-07T23:16:01Z

Finally got released. Still on Oxygen, and for some inhailers I'm taking, as well as waiting on the doc to call in the antibiotics I need to get. Still out of work for a week though ^_^;; But at least I'm home!!

Updating from the hospital!

2007-10-02T22:15:30Z

Ok. Been to the ER on Tuesday morning, run around the hospital a bit as they tried to figure out what type of peumonia, and now settled into a rooom again. They still don't what the type is, and keep asking me to cough something up that isn't coming... ^_^; Keep trying, but no luck, and not very pleasant.

They say I might be releasable tomorrow, don't know how much homerest they plan and putting me on, considering my slight issues moving and still trouble breathing without oxygen. B ran me my laptop, and managed to find a connection around the air to tap into, since pretty sure it's not the hospital. So wish me luck all, hopefully be back and online more soon!

It's official...

2007-09-23T05:26:57Z

Updating for everyone. It's offical, I'm sick... Pneumonia. Bad case of it too. Doc's got me on Medical for about five days, and gotta go back tomorrow to check in. Thanks to the guy delivering the oxygen tanks they are letting me use, taking forever, I didn't even get in to get the prescriptions filled I needed... Thanks a bunch, Oxygen man.

So now, still hacking a bit, not as bad as before. Got a air thing in my nose to help me breath easier, with two tanks for travel. The best part? Pneumona this bad, in someone my age, isn't common... Meaning there must be an outside factor, or likely is. Hearing the suggestions of that has had me funky all day... Not gonna tell though yet. Wait for the blood work, and just praying honestly. Praying it's NOT what their first assumtion is, for how I developed this....

So I might be around somethis week, on house rest... We'll see how well I hold up.

(( Missa, don't tell Mum for me. Left her a message to call me tomorrow so I can, if you see this.))

Game!

2007-09-09T05:32:33Z

Game is KIND running... On break for a couple, finally finished my new character, and thinking about a Soda... Games been running slow, thanks to trying to run the mapping on a computer program shared by everyone, which is being glitchie ^_^;; But so far, not a bad day besides being tired!

Marines and Tampons...

2007-09-08T20:45:02Z

Don't ask. ^_^;;

At game, got an hourish sleep and feeling better after showering. Now, seems one gamer is in the hospital, for crap that happened last night *Car Jacking it seems, I feel bad for him*, one was known to be out hunting this weekend still, and won't be back until next game session, and the last *the yammering one ^_^;;* is just running late. Leaving Brent, Meg, Jess, Matt, and I fiddling around idly.

So yea! might be around some, if things are still not happening and such, if not just leave a message!

Still going!

2007-09-08T15:35:27Z

Honestly? It's 8AM, and I'mjust having insomnia, when I should be sleeping before D&D day with Brent and Meg's friends. Well, guess they are my friends too. ^_^:; The group basically consists of Jessica, Meg's sister, her new Boyu Matt, us three, and around 2-4 of Matt's old gaming friends he's been friends with since... like High School, from the sound of it? Some of the similarities between you all back in Michigan and Ohio, and them, makes it a bit easier to just relax with them... and yet, I still am not comfortable. Not sure about reason...

Last game day, two weeks ago, turned into random games and hanging out, instead of D&D. Me? The majority of the day was spent listening to Porko Rosso *knows I spelled it wrong, likely* for the second watching, while helping Jessica, and occasionally Meg when she wanted to join in again, work on the massive jig saw puzzle, that was apparently some murder mystery too. Way it was explained to me, there is no big pic, you read the accompanying story first, put puzzle together, and then read again to try and figure out the mystery. Never did figure it out, even though she called Meg and discussed it apparently sometime. ^_^;;

As much as I know returning permanently isn't my answer... I miss Michigan and Ohio... Been feeling that way awhile now, and it's more the people and moments I miss, then the place itself.

I miss the intelligent conversations with D (Deanna) and Jewels (Julie), with that surprising level of maturity one moment, and then big lack of the next. ^_^

I miss the ability to speaking completely open about anything with Ree, as the one friend who didn't have one reason or another for me to hide or avoid some random subject in my mind. Also, I might have the backbone I have today, if not for this little friend. ^_~

I miss Christina, her singing and absolutely loved affection for the decade we were born into, among other common subjects, that made it interesting to discuss even things we had been over, because we would think of new things to add into the discussions. I don't think we ever had a conversation completely repeat itself, honestly.

I miss Nicole, and her fellow occupents of the Groovy Room (Way too many to list, trust me), who as a group helped me realize how much I love the lack of normal around myself. I think they would be proud of the sure random nature I have these days, because I love to make people laugh or to surprise them with things out of the blue.

I miss Joel, who had a way or inspiring people. No matter his own personal demons he seemed to deal with at times, he had a way to draw out some of the best in people. The fact that he was the first person I had to finally discuss WoT with, helps. Now, if only he would finish his personal RP game, and publish it, so I could enjoy the original version goodness of it again...

I miss Shiny Mike. While we had our differences in the later year, it was nice having someone who to sympathize with, and for, in the way we went about life. I really hope the Doctor never stops his drawing, as he fixes peoples brains over and over again, that creativity was one of the best things he had.

I miss Doogle, Ramiro, and Levi. The first close guy friends I had, and always a nice balance. While things fell apart slowly afterward, during highschool it was great having them around, whether it was random porn or Dune surfing with Doogle at 1AM, a few hours before drinking some of his uber coffee (aka coffee with a S*&%load of milk and sugar added) to stay awake longer, listening to Mero gripe about the latest girl he was seeing, or wanted to see, or sometimes just whining about never figuring out a Magic the Gathering deck that could beat Doug, or Levi's uber Strategy game awareness, that almost various styles of laughing that ranged from Joker insane to deep evil warlord, or the fact that so many of his friends that saw him enjoying the occasional regular thing back in high school never saw the uber dorkness. Never out of hiding it, they just didn't always notice, and when they did, didn't care. Levi was just something you could enjoy being friends with, no matter the cercomstances.

I miss Erica. ^_^ One of two Net who still ranks with the best of my friends, I'm happy to have seen her grown so much over the years, going from a relationship from high school that was good and bad, to finding someone she's honestly happy with, as well as a job she enjoys, even if her co-workers/bosses sound like nitwits sometimes (Hey, who's don't, ne?). I'm still looking forward to seeing where she goes next.

I miss Pam, one of those truely random net friends you meet through some random common thread (Very random, considering the book series RP we met in, she was pulled into by an RL friend, as she hadn't even read the books yet!) that turned into something special for it's while.

I miss Cassi. A young woman from Florida, from AOL RPs, who just had a way of making me smile when we would randomly play the characters we had who knew one another, or just through random chatting. I wish I hadn't lost track of her somehow, all those years ago.

I miss Carr. The man with the plan he's not sure he's finish yet. Paranoid beyond belief sometimes, I never felt I couldn't trust him, or ask for his help, should I ever need it. While I've picked up a bit of his paranoia from my time in the Commune, the things I was able to learn there outway that in my mind.

I miss Lilu. Considering some of the negative details at the end of my stay in Ohio, this can't be helped. She had an honest passion to help people, even at her own expense. A sarcastic and realistic attitude that had been more suited for a 30 year old, combined with the adoration of a 14 Japanese school girl Otaku, she was a gem to have in the Commune during my stay there.

I miss Mitchie. I'll admit openly, I didn't know him as well as I liked, but he was likely the most intelliegent person I've met in years. Not to oust my older Michigan friends on the brainie side, Mitch was a perfect combination of Book Smarts, and Street Smarts. Last I heard, he scooted into the military of some form, all I hope is he makes it back to dazzle us with more obscure and effective Leveling strategies for Video games, or unbeatable Magic decks of Doom.

I miss the commune. Jeff, Ken, those weren't part of the things I miss... But Erin and her random quirkyness, Liska's well done Rock paradoy and humor, Hooper's constant referencing of his Horse Weiner and long memory of gaming details.... There is alot of Ohio I found in the year I lived there, and I miss it almost as much as the things that took me 20ish to see in Michigan.

I miss Vanessa. Tiny little Porturican girl, with an attitude that couldn't be matched. Racist? Maybe, but never in a way that was hateful, at least as my head saw it. She was always good for a laugh and chat, even if she had such trouble understanding the dork in her Boyfriend *or Ex*, as well as Brent and I.

I miss Jose, Magdaleno, and Martian. Three brother's Cedillo who worked with me at Wendy's at different points, all general pervs, and yet always the first to finish work and joke around for a bit while we waited for close. When I was a closing crew, they were a strong point of how I kept my sanity sometimes.

I miss Regina. A russian girl here on a work permit, who started closing after I was a manager for Wendy's, and one of those types of people you regret never trying to get to know more. It had been ages since I had talked with someone who seemed as...pure? Innocent? Seemed it, or perhaps another word to better suit the thought will come later, it's enough to say I regret missing my chance, work be damned, and still miss here a good deal.

I miss my mother, someone so like me, yet different. Who watched me grow up from the naive, bright, and way too innocent boy, into the man I am today. Knowing her first half of a century is past her weighs on me a bit, to be honest, but I try not to think about it too much. She's tough, and she'll keep going until I have grandkids running around her ankles likely.

I miss my Grandmother, who I think about more then my mother, when it comes to thinking about age. Especially when it included some of the things she lived through, concerning things that are her private details, I can't help worrying each time I think about her. She was one of those corner stones, like my mother is, one of those consistancies you know is always there. The thought that within a few years, she might not be there anymore... it's hard to deal with.

I miss my Uncles and Aunts... So many, who always watched out for me, especially the Uncles who apparently decided to try and play 'father figure' for my lack of one. I hope I'm doing them proud, even if I am floundering a bit of late.

I miss my cousins... Unlike some of you with Siblings, I never had any... (the change to this, I'll add later) So to me, my cousins, close to my age or not, were like the brothers and sisters I never had. Even in my late teens and such, when I started breaking off from my family more then I enjoy recalling, the feeling is still there. Honestly, I wish I could tell them just what they mean to me, even so many years since I've seen them...

I miss Grandma King, who I only knew for a few years, my mother knowing her much more then I... When I heard she was in the hospital and might not make it out, I was so edgy, even if I had just met her for the second time so recently... And finding out her small fits and such were calmed, just from hear that I sent my love from across the country... It's one of those things I can figure out HOW it mattered, but I'm glad it did, so she could go in peace...

I miss my Sisters, half ones in reality, who I only met and spoke to only a handful of times after finding out they exhisted, and yet still filled a small part of my heart, even if they were content in their lives without the half brother they had never known.

I miss one specific cousin... one I hadn't seen in years, since her mom divorced my uncle, one I saw again with her brother at my Grandmother's second wedding... and who was killed by a drunk driver, along with her soon to be step-brother. It's hard to explain how crappy I feel for forgetting her name even this long after, even though I know it's how my memory works... I also feel bad, since it was her death and how bad I took it, that made me realize how close I held my cousins, who I had not seen much of in those years...

Edit: Jennifer. Jennifer was her name. Thanks to my mom, for reminding me. God's, has it been so long...?

On a side note, while rummaging for said name of cousin in my small box of important things... I found my Dragon Tarot. It was the first Tarot set I ever bought, because of my adoration for Draconic things, and hadn't seen it since sometime in the commune, after I began using it at Denny's when we went in the early morning, out of a lack of ability to stay in the conversations being had sometimes, those moments I had trouble fitting in... Makes me miss when I felt a bit more spiritual then I am now, something I still considering getting back into.

My Mom rocks. ^_^V

Alright all. I'm either gonna crash and burn *for like 2-3 hours* or force myself to stay awake until game's done with. Running a new Barbarian character tonight, Garr, to replace the very not working out Gnomish Bard I tried. ^_^;;

Anyway, needless to say, this is a VERY small portion of what I miss... I might do something like this again, but not likely. I'm not a very consistant person. But I did want you all, the few of you who read this, to know I miss ya and hope to see you all again, whether your new friends or old. ^_^ As long as I matter to ya, it's all good by me.

Final Note: This may sound odd, but if you all have any questions about any of this, ask away. Curious about a detail, wanna know more details, or something just plain catches your eye? Things like that always get my attention to dabble more out into this little journal of bytes and data. ^_^V

Harry Potter battles Pubertis.

2007-07-11T22:29:09Z

Saw Harry Potter. Good movie. Crappy day since then, but not venting it here.

Anyway wanting to see it, should give it a look.

About the old friends in the last post mentioned, contacted one with a comment in a journal entry. So now, we'll see what happens.

Off to another night of Hel... I mean another night of work.

Later -_-

Rocker

Finally ^_^;;

2007-07-10T22:28:01Z

Only been ages since I posted... Ok, maybe only since January, but I've got a really good reason! Wendy's sucks! ^_^;;

Ok, seriously though, kinda ran into a quandry, and needing some advice, so thought to turn here, since this is the best area to ask all my friends, without catching individually and such.

Essentially, I found Journals for friends of mine from Michigan, from WAY back in the day. Like, the ones I was going to school with, and was hanging out with until shortly after high school. Don't recall anything specific to why I stopped seeing them, aside from hanging out with one group made it harder to stick with the other, really, thus just gradually grew apart and lost touch for the most part.

Anyway, I got two questions for anyone who reads this ad wants to toss some advice my way, seeing as my social experience is a bit off from the normal. 1) Is whether I should try or not to get in touch with them? I kinda know how most will answer this one, but the pessimist in me wants to hear it, to help validate the want, anyway. ^_^;; 2) Is how should I contact them, if I do. Just toss a comment in journal's somewhere, saying and hi and about whatever the post is, yata yata, an e-mail, wait and surprise them on messanger, for the few with one? This part is really twisting my head around lately.

For those few wondering why I'm asking about such things, I'm always worried about just how something will come across, or more accurately, if it will come across negatively. Nothing hurts worse then upsetting friends, and so I sometimes just need validation that something I'm gonna try won't instantly turn into my head's worse case scenario. ^_^;;

On a side note, will be setting up a journal on another site, seperate from this, for more of my venting and such. Thinking I might be able to get it out better, knowing people won't read it, at least the people who know me anyway. ^_^;; Don't know if it means I'll post more here, but we'll see.

Merry Christmas everyone!

2006-12-25T11:03:38Z

Happy Holidays, and a Happy New Year to all of you who read this!

Rocker ^_^

rocker55 @ 2006-12-17T01:12:00

2006-12-17T08:40:56Z

I need like a confidence booster shot or something...

So I've been frequenting this club recently. One with dancing ladies who tend to remove clothing, type. And it's gotten to the point of just going in, drink a water or two, and practice massaging to work my hands and release some stress from it. So it's been for awhile, much to the annoyance of my roommate.

So I go in tonight to see Molly, the one who's working towards her own Design and clothing business, to do the usual snack from Wendy's and massage. She asks me to stick around, since a DJ was coming in to play a bit tonight. During all the hub bub, which me basically just sitting and relaxin, I notice this cute girl off to the side with a couple of her friends. After a bit, I ask one of the waitresess I talk with to get her a drink for me. So she responds cutely, get a smile and wave.... and then nothing. I spend the rest of the time she was there, trying to work up the confidence just to walk over and ask her how the drink was, or some other things....

I just overthink things... Fiddling with them in my head repeatedly, often half talking myself out of trying things, just because of the paranoia of being hurt or something...

Just wish I knew a way to get rid of this issue... I know I'm likeable, I'm friendly and a good guy... But this is seriously killing my ability to even try and just casually meet people..

Being single sucks... ^_^;;

When I die...

2006-11-23T07:54:37Z

After you die...
Heaven

After death, you will exist in heaven. Everything and everyone you love will constantly surround you for all of eternity. You lucky scoundrel.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Hehe Surprising

Which Tarot am I...

2006-11-21T11:40:45Z

You are The Devil

Materiality. Material Force. Material temptation; sometimes obsession

The Devil is often a great card for business success; hard work and ambition.

Perhaps the most misunderstood of all the major arcana, the Devil is not really "Satan" at all, but Pan the half-goat nature god and/or Dionysius. These are gods of pleasure and abandon, of wild behavior and unbridled desires. This is a card about ambitions; it is also synonymous with temptation and addiction. On the flip side, however, the card can be a warning to someone who is too restrained, someone who never allows themselves to get passionate or messy or wild - or ambitious. This, too, is a form of enslavement. As a person, the Devil can stand for a man of money or erotic power, aggressive, controlling, or just persuasive. This is not to say a bad man, but certainly a powerful man who is hard to resist. The important thing is to remember that any chain is freely worn. In most cases, you are enslaved only because you allow it.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Stolen from Eri-chi

rocker55 @ 2006-08-13T22:26:00

2006-08-14T05:11:55Z

Reply and I'll give you a random letter, and you have to find five songs that start with that letter and post them to your journal.

Alternatively, reply with a letter, and I'll do another post like this.

LadyIapetus gave me the letter J.

Jigga what/Faint ~ Jay Z/Linkin Park
Just died in my arms tonight ~ Journey
Just like a Prayer ~ Madonna
Just Breath ~ Anna Nalick
Jingle Bells ~ Classic Christmas carol

I admit it, I cheated a little... ^_^;; Surprising how few songs start with J hehe

Hehe Robotech goodness

2006-08-03T19:24:22Z

http://www.animenewsnetwork.com/article.php?id=9295

Hehe for the couple of friends, who are Robotech lovers like my roomie, something to help the urging for the next couple monthes.... Unless it was already known ^_^;;

Interesting...

2006-06-15T03:52:24Z

Avatar 1-3, Batman Beyond DVD set one, and X-men Evo Season 3. ^_^ I really gotta stop spending so much in spurts...

Was happy to see Bleach manga has finally reached two of my favorite fights. Ichigo vs Kenny, and Ichigo vs *spoiler* ^_^ It's all good.

rocker55 @ 2006-05-24T10:30:00

2006-05-24T16:51:01Z

So, Pain killer assisted sleep later, I'm awakened to find out the Insurance people couldn't find anything... So left a message with our HR rep, but considering the stories I've heard about lacking responses, I'm trying to decide who to go to next. Might ask roomie and/or our District Manager how to talk to after she doesn't answer, so I can get this straightened out. It's the lovely, convoluted mess, that Wendy's loves to make...

For those who don't know *which is likely only excluding one net friend, roommates, and my employees* I'm officially bald. Or, I was Fri and Sat. Shaved it all off with the electric razor I brought, them smoothed it out with the other. Now, it's got short stubby hairs over it save the actually balding spots in front and back. ^_^;;

Course, WHY I did it is still pestering me... Been telling everyone it was for a change of pace, not untrue mind you, but... The morning it happened, I can honestly say I was using it as an alternate to finding something to punch, thanks to the really bad mood I was in... Needed to lash out, and my hair took the beating. Already miss it, sadly too. But at the least, saves me a haircutting bill for awhile, until my finances are more stable.

My story writing is still completely blocked up... Kingdom Hearts continuation past two idea of Brent's I'm gonna help with, my Inuyasha and digimon stories, not to mention the couple of Negima ones I wanna do... and my brains just completely blocking up and trying to get them actually written.

So right now, I'm trying to decide how I want to handle things... My temper and bad moods have been getting worse, thus basically just trying to find a way to cope, and no ideas have come to me yet. Anyway, gonna go back to trying to write while I snag a Seirra Mist to drink. Laters all!

rocker55 @ 2006-05-23T17:05:00

2006-05-23T23:08:22Z

Well, got the Wisdom tooth that's been scraping my cheek out today. Apparently, it was missing a chunk, thus the scrapping... ^_^;; Also, found out my dental insurance people have no record of me... which is yet another to my 'list of annoyances with Wendy's' chart, considering likely it'sd their fault...

Otherwise, things have been alright I guess. Trying to get writing on various sdtories lately. Dealing with work when I need too, yata yata and so forth. ^_^;;

And I'm still filling out that last tag Kim gave me, expect that in the next post or so.